


An Attractive Ladies Man

by JantoJones



Series: Brief Briefings [93]
Category: The Man From U.N.C.L.E. (TV)
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-20
Updated: 2017-06-20
Packaged: 2018-11-16 15:34:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 599
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11255850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JantoJones/pseuds/JantoJones





	An Attractive Ladies Man

There was a certain element with Research and Development which Napoleon Solo tended to avoid. There were many scientists with U.N.C.L.E. but there were a few for whom science was everything, to the detriment of anything else. They usually had a severe lack of social skills, and wouldn’t know what to do with a member of the opposite sex if they offered themselves to them.

However, as CEA, it was his duty to visit R&D to see what was being developed for agents to use, which is what had led him onto the bowels of the building. Their latest breakthrough was a pheromone spray. It was an adaptation of a Thrush spray which was designed to attract men, and render then open to questioning. Indeed, many U.N.C.L.E. agents had succumbed to it in the past. Eventually, one agent was able to get hold of the formula and a new version had been designed. This time it would attract women.

Napoleon almost laughed aloud at the thought. Attracting women was something he had never had a problem with. In fact, he had quite the backlog in his social diary, of women he had agreed to take out on a date. As he listened to the scientists drone on about the properties of the new formula, Solo absentmindedly sprayed some, to see if it had a scent; it didn’t.

“Thank you, gentleman,” he suddenly blurted, unwilling to listen to anymore. “I’m sure this development is going to be extremely useful.”

Napoleon headed back to his office, with the intention of inviting Illya out to lunch. As he made his way through the corridors he soon noticed that he was gaining a following. Every woman he’d passed had dropped what they were doing in order to go wherever Napoleon went.

“Uh, hi ladies,” he turned, and greeted them. “Is there something I can do for you?”

“Whatever you want,” one replied.

“What can I do for you,” said another.

“I’m kinda busy right now,” Napoleon told them. “Maybe we can all get together later.”

Continuing on his journey, he was acutely aware that the women were sticking with him. As he travelled, more of them joined the throng. Reaching the door of his office, he heard one of them tell another that he was hers. This was greeted by a chorus of denial from all the others. Without warning, Napoleon was grabbed by Susie from accounts, only to be pulled away from her by Janine from communications.

Almost immediately, all the women made a grab for him and starting tearing his clothes. He didn’t notice when his office door opened, and Illya reached out. The Russian dragged the American in and locked the door.

“What was that about?” he asked.

“I suspect it has something to do with a new pheromone spray R&D have come up with,” Solo explained. “It seems to be a little too potent.”

“And here was I thinking you enjoyed the attention of the ladies,” Illya said, with a barely supressed smile.

“I do, but one at a time,” Napoleon protested. “Possibly even two. Even I can’t manage that many. I need a shower, and a fresh change of clothes.”

He picked up the phone to tell Waverly of the situation. He Old Man cleared the corridors of female staff to allow Napoleon to get to the locker room. Before he left the office, napoleon held up the remnants of his tattered jacket.

“The cost of replacing this will be come straight out of the R&D budget.”


End file.
